Les aventures d'Audrey
- Audrey
- Aug 3, 2019
- 5 min read
There are two humans that live with me, a young(ish) one I’ll call ‘Cookie’ because he cooks a lot. The other one I’ll call ‘Who’ because for as long as I can remember he left home very early everyday and didn’t return until much later, so much so that sometimes I forgot he lived there with me. That’s changed recently though and he seems to be around a lot more.
I liked the flat I lived in, we moved there about five years ago. I had my own balcony where I could go through a special door the humans had installed for me. I could come and go as I pleased. I’d sit outside and watch people as they went past but they never saw me. The humans didn’t use this balcony much, once or twice when it was sunny, otherwise it was all mine!
During the winter I was sitting on a pile of cushions on my chair and listened to the humans speaking, generally I didn’t listen much to them only when I thought they were talking about me. I caught snippets but I wasn’t sure what it all meant:
“Of course she’ll be fine she’s been in it before…”
“We’ll get a halter and lead, she might want to go for a walk…”
“We’ll just have to see how she travels…”
I pondered on this for a while, but didn’t catch anything else so forgot about it.
A couple of months or so ago there they kept taking me to the human in the green coat, not in the wire basket but a black fabric case with mesh in it. This was new, they’d tricked me! Everytime we went he weighed me and said I was a lovely cat - like I wasn’t there! Then he jabbed me in the back of the neck and we went home. I’m not sure what it was about and I didn’t like it to be honest.
Suddenly lots of big empty boxes arrived and the humans were putting their stuff into them. I didn’t like this at all and sought solace in my favourite place. I went there if I wanted them to think I’d gone missing - (naughty but a girl’s got to have some fun). I spent a good deal of time in the corner of the bedroom they didn’t sleep in, under the bedside cabinet, it’s cool and quiet there.
At the beginning of July I found myself back in this black fabric case - I was worried they were taking me to the human in the green coat again, but I heard Cookie say “yes, we’ll take her to the van now, it’ll be less stressful for her.”
Less stressful???
Cookie took me out of the flat and put me in the orange car. He was talking to me all the time but I wasn’t listening - where was he taking me? What was going to happen. Well I kicked off shouting at the top of my voice, he didn’t seem to listen:
“Shhhhsh”
“We’re nearly there”
“Everything will be ok”
Well it wasn’t ok, I hadn’t been told what was happening, where we were going or when we’d get there!
We drove for a while and then stopped, hang on - I’ve been here before. I recognise the smell. We lived here for a while last year - something about a kitchen being fitted and no where to feed Audrey. We entered this thing - big, mainly white, it’s sort of like a flat but it wobbles a bit when the humans move around. As I remember I quite like it, I have my own seat to stretch out on and the humans are close when I need them. All was going well for a few days, I’d settled in and they seemed very happy.
“We’ll set off by 10 tomorrow”
“Have you filled the water?”
“Have you got the postcode for the site?”
They were talking in riddles again.
Well the next day I found out, the flat started moving and lurching about. I wasn’t sure about this at all and wanted to find out what was happening. I jumped down off the bed to see what the humans were doing. Who was sat on the right behind the big wheel thing and Cookie was on the left. I explored around them for a bit and jumped up onto the ledge with all the dials on. The next thing I know the lurching has stopped and that black case has come out. I’m in it and sitting on Cookie’s lap. Then the lurching starts all over again. I’m really not sure about all of this.
Well the flat lurching has happened a lot recently. It stops moving, I get comfy and the humans talk and sit on the sofas. Then the next day I’m back in that black case on the sofa as the flat rumbles along. I’m getting used to it now and take the opportunity to have a snooze. I like it when the flat just keeps going, but sometimes it pitches to one side and then the other.
I don’t think they have any idea where they are going as they have this woman with them when this happens - I’ve never seen her but she says things like:
“Turn left in 500 metres”
“Take the third exit at the roundabout”
“You have arrived at your destination”
When we stop moving I’m allowed out of my black case. The flat seems just the same although the view from the window is different. One time when we stopped I looked out the window and saw these enormous big brown animals - I think they were called “cows” - really odd looking things. Another time we stopped at this place with loads of other big white flats and lots of humans milling around. Cookie and Who seemed really happy and we stayed there for almost a week.
I’ve worked some things out now.
I know the black case is going to come out when the two front seats are turned to face the big window at the front and I hear them say things like:
“Have you turned the gas off”
“Are the vents shut”
I've decided there are:
things I like:
the humans are with me a lot more which I like
to snuggle up to Who and he tickles my tummy - I love it when this happens
the smell of Cookie’s feet
my usual treats and watching Cookie as he prepares their food - sometimes a bit comes my way
getting the pick of the seats - I smile to myself when they say “Oh I won’t sit there, I don’t want to disturb Audrey”
getting brushed a lot
seeing lots of different things
things I’m not so sure about:
I miss my balcony
the black case although it’s better than the wire one and I haven’t seen the human in the green coat for a while
the moving flat, I’m getting used to it, but it still seems a bit weird to me!
I’ll keep you updated with how I get on!
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